A Reason To Live

The one who saved my life


Hali Cortes with her sister in 2015 at the mall taking Easter pictures.

Hali Cortes , Writer

Sitting in a dim, cold bathroom, no noise or movement, I thought to myself should I do it?

April 23, 2013, I was minding my own business when I was accused of saying something I never said, now suddenly I was stuck in between these two girls fighting. While sitting there I began to panic, my palms sweating and my legs shaking. I didn’t understand how I had anything to do with this.

They had been bullying me prior to this, calling me names and making fun of me for no reason. Now I worried things were going to get worse.

In that moment my nightmare was coming true.

As the chaos intensified one of the girls started walking towards me. I asked her what I did wrong. With no answer at all, she slammed my head into the wall behind me. I sat in shock just wanting to go home. Shortly after, the bell rang, and I ran home crying in fear that these girls were following me.

I got into my apartment and broke down. I remember sitting in a corner with my knees to my head, rocking back and forth, crying, and saying over and over again I wanted it all to end, none of this was fair.

I didn’t eat, I sat in my room in the dark, I wanted nothing to do with anyone.

I had been bullied for 5 years and I was finally done.

After a stressful afternoon everyone in my house was in bed, or so I thought. I walked into the bathroom ready to end everything.

The pitter patter of little feet walking across the floor stopped in front of the bathroom. My little sister was still awake.

My little sister who looked up to me. My little sister I’d taken care of her whole life. My little sister I loved.

Suddenly it was clear. I had a lot to live for.

Just before she pushed the door open, I put the pill bottle back. I couldn’t help but grab my sister and cry. She hugged me and reassured me that she loved me, but she never knew what was happening, never knew she’d given me a reason to live.

Now I’m in Texas and this part of my life should be a distant memory, but it’s not it hurt too much to just let it go.

Bullying should never be the reason why someone wants their whole world to stop turning.